down200

72

2012-01-24T03:55:00.000-08:00

well i'm pretty happy the first 4 weeks are gone and i lost 26.2 pounds. this is from my poor scale, since i'm at the 4 week mark i think i will head to the DALC today and get a real weigh-in on a decent scale. i'm actually 3.8 pounds short of the "real goal". which was 30 for the first 4 weeks. it's no surprise i've come up short of that, i had 4-5 days of cheating/messing up. i'm past that now. i think the DALC scale may reveal i'm even closer to that goal. i'm happy to be a month into this and solidly on it (more then the loss itself). this diet isn't about suffering (there's a little of that at the start) it's more about time. i think i will catch up on the 3.8 pounds.

on an unrelated note: it snowed yesterday, i got up early to shovel and deal with ice on the jeep and roads. anyway in my new place on main street in kasson we are required to shovel within 24 hours of a snowfall's completion. i shoveled in the morning at 4:00am but it was still snowing. didn't stop until about 10 am. when i got home around 5:30 it had been shoveled again, but poorly - appeared to be done by a brush or something. i redid it again - because who ever did it just made it worse.

the city will charge you if you don't shovel within 24 hours (i shoveled twice within a 10 hour period). this is being posted should who ever shoveled (a third time) still within that time frame, somehow claims i (and my neighbor) had failed to shovel. that is not the case. myself and my next door neighbor have been very diligent and have been doing one-another's sidewalks. could be that the neighbor to the right did both of ours as a courtesy. that's OK - just don't want the city claiming we failed to fulfill their requirements. both sidewalks were done 3x within the required time frame :)

78

2012-01-11T16:56:00.000-08:00

278 half a pound :)

78.2

2012-01-10T17:36:00.001-08:00

I made it, weighed in at the DALC and was at 278.2. So 2 weeks and I'm down 20 lbs right to the tenth of a pound. So by next Tuesday the goal is to lose another 5 pound and going forward - every week.

82

2012-01-09T03:43:00.001-08:00

i'm not sure - maybe my theories are wrong??? or it's the scale. i have been at 282 for two days straight :(

82.5

2012-01-07T04:50:00.000-08:00

yesterdays weigh-in was done at the DALC (so more accurate). i'm getting excited about my weight loss film again - even thought there is so much other stuff to be excited about right now... i think it's going to be great - it's gong to be all the richer for africa and if my weight drops identically (without all the exercise) it could be significant. i'm going to start filming myself again (for down 200), as i go thru this second phase of thew weight loss.

83.2

2012-01-06T16:44:00.000-08:00

Met the 15 Lbs. Down mark today. Happy about that. This is also day 4 of really being strict. I always get 15 in the first week but I started with not so perfect days. It's been a week and three days. I'm hoping that over the next 4 days I willl lose 5 more pounds and be back on track :)

going well though.

85

2012-01-05T17:36:00.001-08:00

Droped again and again I stayed tight to my diet. The scale is awlful I be getting a new one soon.

86.5

2012-01-04T13:34:00.000-08:00

I'M A LITTLE OFF SCHEDULE BUT PRETTY HAPPY AS I'M VERY SOLIDLY ON THE diet - opps the caps lock was on... sticking to it :)

90.6

2011-12-30T04:29:00.000-08:00

eeekk - no loss i ate a little chinese carry out last night... will tighten up today, hope for a 2 pound drop by tomorrow morning - need to make the weekly goals, 15 for this week :)

90.6

2011-12-29T04:14:00.000-08:00

happy - got thru day 2 - better then day one now down 7.8 pounds. just need a great day three. feeling good / confident of finally getting back on this. i fully expect to lose 15 pounds in the first week. i've done this enough to know the numbers.

93.4

2011-12-28T03:38:00.000-08:00

not perfect (i.e. under 600 calories) but i did OK, got home and didn't over-eat. also decided to simply state the pounds without the hundreds decimal (hahaha) just seems a little more manageable :)

need a "perfect day" today and hope to keep that up till i'm back down...

298.2

2011-12-27T03:53:00.001-08:00

not going well - i actually had a couple days getting close then one full day "perfect", then the xMas collapse. i'm trying to get it going again today and i need to start weighing in again daily. this morning i realized that the last time i was successful (prior to africa) i was 100% dedicated to the effort. i was living and breathing weight loss and my whole life revolved around it. since kenya i have been dedicated almost entirely to the obligations that grew from going to kenya. in fact they have expanded to include somalia as well and the obligations are not going to lessen any time soon - in fact ever, but neither do i want to simply gain all the weight back...

for now i hope to get back on the diet today. 100% on it. worry about tomorrow tomorrow.

289.4

2011-11-28T07:48:00.000-08:00

trying again :)

just have to get back on it. having gained back as much as i have gives me the opportunity to test a crazy theory, that exercise has no effect on weight loss. i have good reason to believe this and if there is anything positive in gaining back some of the weight loss this may be it.

290

2011-11-17T15:05:00.000-08:00

ha - not good huh? gained three after getting so psyched. well i have had a good day today and hope to go home and get day 1 (500 calories or less) behind me. :(

288

2011-11-16T03:51:00.000-08:00

too bad - i had a 2 week vacation and stayed at home (and it messed me up) gained back the weight - ugghhhh. well today i start again, this is it. i know my triggers (it's being at home. tonight i will work until late at Panera - come home and go straight to bed. doing it. today will be day one. determined. wish me luck. 4 months from now back to my africa weight (and hopefully back in africa too).

262.8

2011-07-25T18:50:00.000-07:00

made my goal + one pound - the next goal is 258.8 by next monday :)

265.2

2011-07-22T20:07:00.001-07:00

266.8

2011-07-20T18:18:00.001-07:00

267.4

2011-07-13T20:01:00.001-07:00

268

2011-07-12T19:09:00.000-07:00

268.6

2011-07-11T18:56:00.001-07:00

1st week behind me - i lost 14lbs - it's usually 15lbs in the first week (so real close) i had a poor weekend though and also i actually lost about 6 before the official start. so down 20 now. the next goal is 5 lbs. and it'll be 5 lbs every work going forward. so i need to be down to 263.6 by next monday july 18th.

270.2

2011-07-08T05:40:00.000-07:00

07.05 282.6
07.06 275.6
07.07 272.8
07.08 270.2

back on it :) - should be interesting, testing my crazy theory that exercise has no effect on weight-loss.

2011-07-03T02:39:00.000-07:00

272.4

274.6

2011-06-18T02:45:00.000-07:00

275

2011-06-15T03:59:00.001-07:00

277.8

2011-06-10T19:40:00.001-07:00

285.2 :(

2011-06-09T21:25:00.000-07:00

288

2011-04-25T03:56:00.001-07:00

288

starting tomorrow

2011-04-22T21:17:00.001-07:00

283.8

it's been a long time :)

2011-02-18T14:34:00.000-08:00

It's been a long time - this project is still alive. but my life has moved so dramatically in a whole new direction. my weight is way up right now and I have not ben running consistantly. i hope to get started again (maybe tomorow). i need to start bloging again too. right here and also on the site for my other film. it's called the road to punda milia.

that project has supeceded this one as the making of that film and the entire scope of the project and all that entails is in fact the "living big" aspect of this project... it's so much "bigger" then i ever DREAMED! and even though my wieght is back up a bit - i'm very happy with life right now - in nearly all it's aspects :)

confession :)

2010-07-19T04:47:00.000-07:00

i have been avoiding blogging as my struggles to get the weight off continue. the struggle is just to get back into the pre-africa habits. i know what i need to do and it's just a matter of getting through the first hard week - after that it's easy. but this has really been an eye opener for me. the first time i had success with this approach i stuck with it for 3 months and lost 85 pounds - then went off for just one weekend and it took like 6-7 years off trying to get back on it. i stayed with it a lot longer this last time, met my goals and have now gained back 40 + pounds.

i'm trying again today, got through most of three days a few weeks ago and fell off, the eye opener is just how difficult it is to get going. i can't take that for granted any longer.

on a positive note i got a lot done on the melon website this weekend! it'll go live soon! at least in beta form.

i weighed 253.8 today.

242.8

2010-06-25T17:28:00.000-07:00

Just finished my second run - the weeks over, I weighed 242.8 today, wish it was lower :)

I do realize if I just maitain a strict approach this weekend I could easily be back in the 230's come next Monday when I weigh in again.

I weighed 242.8 today

250.2

2010-06-21T10:41:00.001-07:00

It's been frustrating over the last couple months - I have managed to take off and keep off a little weight but not able to really move it down consistently. Yesterday it had moved up a little even. I weighed in at 250.2 after my run and what's worse is that's going into a weekend.

So today (Saturday) I have somehow managed to get through the day with the HMR only. It's almost 7:30 pm - I think I will make it through day one. This is what I need to do, it's not easy. I won't weigh in again until Monday.

Well it's Monday and I have yet to finish this post. Yesterday was really bad - I made it through the day OK - but had some major - withdrawal symptoms. Feeling normal today and still on the diet :)

I weighed 244.2 today.

blogger's block

2010-06-06T16:39:00.001-07:00

It's been so odd. I've been feeling the need to blog, I have plenty to blog about, I've sat down to blog - but then I just don't feel like doing it. It's odd because there was a time when I was blogging everyday. It was in the midst of my big push for the weight loss and I'd stop back at my computer at work after my second run to do my blog. In other words I'd have to really go out of my way to get it done.

So now I have two blogs going - each about the two different film projects I have. As to the weight loss blog - good news there is that I'm comfortably back into the 14 mile a day runs. Though, on some days run a little less. It seems to alternate between 13.26 and 14.38 (still good either way).

As to the "Road to Pundamilia" my other film - I have finished the first rough cut of one segment. Hopefully today I will get a few more things at least planned out. It was an intense effort to get that first cut finished and of-course it's too long but I think I will move on to another segment. I think it would be better to get away form the first segment for awhile.

Not my best blog but better then nothing. Here's something I found today while searching through old emails from one of the volunteers in Africa. This is GREAT!

I´m so happy I went there, I´m so happy I experienced this all, now I´m more ready to help africa in the future, I´m ready to face corruption and disappointment and I´m ready to face love :) because in Kenya I saw more love than anywhere else in the world, I carried God in my arms and I kissed God good night, and God hugged me when I was leaving and made me feel wanted, needed, important, and all the kids in WWB loved God and He was always with them and inside them, all the little hearts I met there were filled with love...incredible, pure love for life.

and now I love Africa more than ever before...

– Jarka Bednarova

who knows?

2010-05-11T10:08:00.000-07:00

it was another bad weekend - i was hoping to go liquids only but didn't. staying at home and "not eating" is really difficult. even after a fairly good week. i didn't gain back too much though or at least the gain didn't last too long.

i weighed 249.6 yesterday (monday morning after the morning run) - and had a significant drop more by the end of the second run, last night i weighed 245.4 (back to where i was on Friday) - who knows??? i ran again this morning and was at 244.2 - we'll see where i end up after tonight's run. i'm looking forward to being in the 30's again - it may happen this week. i'm starting to think about the skin removal surgery again. it'll set me free from this body, i feel i'm back on track.

i lost something today

2010-05-06T18:16:00.000-07:00

it was as i thought it might be - i did poorly by being at home all weekend - very hard to be there and not eat. i did get the opportunity to get a start on my film - though i think i spent just as much time mowing the grass as i did editing. i gained 5 pounds over the weekend and then i couldn't run at all on tuesday. i weighed 253.4 on monday - didn't weigh myself on tuesday, yesterday i weighed 250 and tonight i weighed 245.4. i've got to do better this weekend.

i lost my big toe nail tonight. i have been beating up my feet for nearly 2.5 years now... i've had toe nails turn black three times - but this is the first time this has happened - what does one do? do i bury it and have a service? or keep it as a memento? super glue it back on? will a new toe nail grow back? it felt like i was in the movie "Fly" or "District 9". This toe has been bothering me for the last few months.

i weighed 245.4 today.

it's hard

2010-04-28T17:58:00.000-07:00

i'm on my third day of the 2 a day runs - today was better then yesterday. Yesterday as the 2nd run started I crashed and burned. i've had this happen before. 3-4 times over the last 2 plus years i've been running. i don't know what causes it but i just feel weak all over - like i'm about to collapse. it felt that way walking over to the DAHLC. i still got dressed and on a treadmill hoping it might go away - it didn't. the first day of these double runs - Monday - went great and today was good too. For the record yesterday i weighed 245.6 and today 244.6, so it's dropping again. just need to stick with this now.

i'm back

2010-04-26T17:39:00.000-07:00

back on the two a day runs - it's been since July 12th of 2009 since i have run this much in one day. hopefully my legs won't cramp up tonight. it's not just the run i'm also dropping down to 600 calories or less a day again. it's a defeat of sorts. it was always my belief that maintenance would not require the same effort it took to get the weight off. i think i was wrong. i thought 7 miles a day would be enough - but i'm going back to 14 a day now. it's a bit agrivating to think i need to run that much to maintain my loss - but whatever.

i weighed 246.2 today

my plan

2010-04-25T15:29:00.000-07:00

yesterday after my run i weighed 249. for the last few months i have weighed between 247 and 252. i need to get this weight dropping again. i stopped doing the second runs after africa because i needed the time to get work done for the site and other africa related issues. there's still much to do along those lines but when i first stopped the second run i was using the early morning time to get some work done. now i'm not. i'm running after work and getting home so tired and late enough i'm not able to work on anything anyway.

i'm going back to the 2 a day runs. starting monday. it'll feel good if i can manage it. right now i'm thinking i may do this for 5 days a week. take the weekends off from the running entirely to start editing the film. i'll still be push mowing the yard (rather large yard) so i'll get some exercise on the weekends. i'm also going to try to get back on the 600 calorie a day diet. do those two things and i know the weight will drop quickly.

anyway - i need to get a trip planned to florida, my mom is quite interested in seeing all the footage - she gave up the internet altogether so she has not seen any of it. a quick trip to canada has got to happen soon also, to finish filming alicia's story.

i hope it's not raining too much again today.

i weighed 249.2 today.

Movie themes for "The Road to Punda Milia"

2010-04-13T10:59:00.001-07:00

I ran this morning - it was great. I moved it up from 6 miles to 6.85 (same the night before). I was at 7.5 miles (2x a day) before I left for Africa, so I have a ways to go to get back but it felt so good. That's over an hours time span.

I'm making plans to head to Canada to finish filming Alicia. Her story is so cool but of course I can't share much because it'd be a spoiler. I'm also hoping to go to Spain to film/interview Iratxe - she's in Molo now and has done so many incredible things - her impact is astounding.

I said I was going to begin to talk about "The Road to Punda Milia" - at SXSW during one of our dinners I got to pick the brains of my two film making cohorts, Jay Koski and Mitch Winkler. The advice re:organizing my thoughts/ideas and how to begin the editing process were quite valuable. The film is about International Volunteering and our dinner conversation touched upon many aspects of what this is going to be. Mitch got to see some of the footage and was very impressed with both the content and quality.

Here are a few themes:

1. American obesity in our population and the starvation and malnutrition in Kenya. American over consumption in light of abject poverty elsewhere.

2. Giving back what I took (you should never take more then you give), related to the first theme, but personal as I lost 160 lbs before going to Africa - basically I lived the first half of my life unfairly.

3. Quest for personal transition - on the outside and from within.

4. The transforming experience of volunteering

5. Being those without (poverty)

Not sure how these will (or if they will) be incorporated into the film but they will be on my mind as I start to organize things.

I weighed 247.2 today.

the road to punda milia

2010-04-09T14:42:00.000-07:00

it's time to begin blogging about "the road to punda milia" - it's way past time actually and I am working on a new blog site specifically for "punda milia" but as that film is part of the down200 film - i'll just post the blogs on both. the two films are absolutely tied together. one represents my physical transformation - the loss of 200 pounds the other my transformation from within. the road to punda milia is about international volunteering - but on a personal level it represents the start of a new life for me.

i weighed 249.5 yesterday

doing something great

2010-04-04T09:40:00.000-07:00

just got back from my run and it went well - i weighed 247.0

some folks were just going into st. Johns church for easter service. i thought about iraxte (new friend from spain) and that she will be traveling today from Nairobi to Nikaru (by herself). she will spend two weeks at an orphanage there called melon. i spent a little time at melon and i loved the place. i'm worried about iraxte as my travel experience out of nairobi went very badly.

she won't be in church today because she is not a believer. it's interesting because i now have 5 friends from Spain (4 of whom i met in africa) - none are believers. but all of them do both spain and God proud. iraxte has been in Molo for the last couple months - she'll be in Nikaru for the next two weeks - then back to Molo for two more weeks. she has done so many great things while in africa - i just wanted to share this one.

iraxte found several kids in Molo who were at jeopardy to go blind. the poverty is so extreme that these kids and many kids are not able to get the proper health care they need. she took them to a specialist in Nikaru and will be making return trips for their care and has solicited and acquired special drugs from a supplier in spain. because of her efforts 4-5 kids will now have there sight, who would have otherwise gone blind.

how great is that? who will really be in church today? how do we define a believer? is it the one who sets in church and professes belief? or is it the one who travels alone on a road filled with threat to help others? is church in a building or upon a road?

her blog
http://iratxe-kenya2010.blogspot.com/

still with it

2010-04-03T13:47:00.000-07:00

It's a real challenge to get on this low calorie diet - but so far so good - I was at 255.6 five days ago and I've stuck to it for 5 days - I was down to 247.6 today after my run. The run went well too. Working at SMEVA all day today - trying to do my taxes today. Fun times I suppose.

I weighed 247.6 today.

Exercise = Pain

2010-03-31T10:57:00.000-07:00

It never goes away - always one strange pain or another. Now it's my big toe - turning black and hurting, leg cramps again. I got back on my 600 calorie or less diet yesterday. I bought a bunch of Progresso Tomato Soup a few days ago - and finally made it through the day without cheating. So I started at 255.6 - dropped to 252.6 last night. I have only been able to drop to about 249.2 lately - I hope now that I'm back on the extreme calorie cutback I can finally move beyond this and get back down again. Then I'll pursue Mayo for the excess skin removal surgery. It's been a long time coming.

I weighed 252.6 today.

i was a little disappointed

2010-02-28T06:03:00.000-08:00

yesterday i got back to the abraham center to weigh myself for the first time since going in for emergency surgery on a hernia. that was on a wednesday and the tuesday prior i had eaton almost nothing. of course through out the surgery and initial recovery i ate a few packs of crackers and one piece of toast. just felt too nauseous to eat anything. i have heard that people typically lose a lot of weight due to surgery but i only lost 4 lbs. this was such a huge disappointment - it felt like i had lost much more.

to make matters far worse i will not be able to run for the next 2-3 weeks. i was just starting to prepare myself to return to the two a day workouts and now it'll be no workouts. hopefully i will be able to finish the final tasks for the Chazon web site and a few other tasks related to that. i'll have more time now.

i weighed 248.2 yesterday.

Back to SXSW

2010-01-09T13:41:00.001-08:00

Back to SXSW

it's final and approved - i'll be heading to austin texas in march... the sxsw design conference / film festival. it'll be 4 years in a row for me and jay (one of my employees) - mitch will join us also and he's a great one to have a long. he also use to work at mayo clinic and also a filmmaker. he's an oncologist and took a great new gig in wisconsin a few years ago.

austin texas is awesome - i totally love it... it's the best place in the world to watch a film. the films which include many great docs each year and are always inspiring and you learn so much. i have taken on a new role at work and the conference also includes interactive design so i will take advantage of more of those course selections.

so with the good news (this was not a guarantee this year) i have jumped back on my strict calorie restricted diet. i want to get off all the weight i have gained since africa. this is a great incentive and having great incentives is what really works for me. so the plan is not to eat until mid march and my weight should be back to where it was. i hope i can do it.

new years people

2010-01-07T00:52:00.002-08:00

today was good - i was running late with work, tempted to skip the run - went anyway. it's that time of year again when the place is so crowded. can barely find an open locker or an open treadmill!. sadly in a few weeks it'll be back to normal. people's news years resolutions only last a few weeks.

i weighed 255.6 pounds today.

new years people

2010-01-07T00:52:00.000-08:00

blooging late tonight

2010-01-05T19:45:00.000-08:00

my weight dropped a little again - so busy with work not much progress on the site - no free time - got in the run...

i weighed 257 today.

Back to work today

2010-01-04T20:53:00.000-08:00

The vacation is over and hopefully the temptation too overeat with it. I posted a couple of videos from africa on facebook let me know it you want to be friends there . The run was good today :)

I weighed 259 today.

New Years Resolution

2010-01-04T20:52:00.000-08:00

I ran yesterday, so glad the knee was not a factor. It wasn't to painful all day (yesterday) - more stiff and that went away as I started to run. I had a good run - close to 7 miles. Yesterday I worked on a few of the writing tasks for the Chazon site and I also started building a blog for "The Road to Punda Milia" the movie about international volunteering.

Blogging about Africa, both the experience of it and the progress of the film are both long over-due. The blog about my weight loss has to continue and I think the two will go together - they actually do go together. I can't finish the down 200 film without first finishing The Road to Punda Milia, as it's making is a part of the down 200 film. Interestingly the obligations of the Africa project (it's much larger then just a film) have had a profoundly negative effect on my weight. I have to get a handle on this. I have gained over 40 lbs since leaving for Africa. That's in like just five months.

Before leaving for Africa i weighed 215.2, the scales at the Abrams center were not working yesterday so i couldn't weigh in - but my last weigh in had me at 256.8. OK this is the first time I have admitted how much weight I have gained. One reason why I was hesitating to blog was that I ended every blog with how much I weighed and I had been blogging daily. I'm embarrassed for gaining back as much as I have, but I'd rather face that then continue to gain. It's been very positive to be open about my progress (and now my failings) as it creates accountability. So from now on two things - I will start blogging everyday again (some will be quite short) and I will close with my weight (assuming the scale is working :)

2009 recap

2009-12-31T13:38:00.000-08:00

Last year i did a recap blog about 2008, I described 2008 as the best year of my life. It truly was... and it was the best year of my life by a lot! What is amazing to me though is that 2009 could be so much better then 2008 - and also by a lot! I wonder if i can keep this going for 2010 and for every year there after? Although i think the only way to top 2009 would be to die and go to heaven - or maybe I just need to go back to Africa.

In the spring of 2008 I started working on what I thought would be my first film, a documentary about my effort to lose 200 pounds in less then a year. No surgery. No drugs. No fat camps. Just diet and exercise. It's called down 200. But it's not going to be my first film.

The most beautiful thing in all of filmmaking is something that occasionally happens in live event documentaries, like Down 200. You start out with a vision for a film and something happens and the film heads in an unexpected direction. You start out shooting in your own back yard, thinking it a wise choice for your first film (low lying fruit) then magically or more likely via divine intervention you find yourself shooting in Casino, a slum in Molo Kenya... This is the power of filmmaking, it's the power of art and the power of love.

My first film will now be "The Road to Punda Milia" it's about the concept of international volunteering. I spent a month in Molo Kenya this last summer and met some incredible people. My role (as a volunteer) was with respect to fund raising for the Chazon Children's Cenrtre. I was originally trying to get into Watoto Wa Baraka in Makuyu, Kenya, where my friend Jarka Bedranova was serving. I mentioned Jarka in my recap from 2008 - her influence in my life was even bigger in 2009 - it's too complicated and I don't have time to explain it - but thanks Jarks :) - 2009 was amazing!

i got my blog back!

2009-12-30T13:15:00.000-08:00

many thanks to the tech staff at blogspot.com - i'm going to start blogging again regular (i know i have said that many times) but i will try. my wieght has gone up since my return from molo kenya - i'm getting a handle on that...

amazingy while i thought down 2oo would be my first film - it will not be - instead the first film will be the road to punda milia. it's a doc film about international volunteering.

I went to Molo

2009-08-31T16:23:00.000-07:00

I’ve got to start blogging regularly again – I have been asked by many people to sum up the experience and initially that was quite difficult. I think it was the jet lag and I was so busy it was just too hard to process initially. After all it was a complicated trip and also I was there for a month, the purpose/s for going were complex and many events occurred. Anyway I thought I’d start with few bullet points.

I went to Molo, Kenya to volunteer at the Chazon Children’s Centre here’s what happened:

I met some incredible people whom I now love deeply.

I met 72 kids who loved nothing more then to be close to me.

I met and interviewed a brilliant man running for the Kenyan parliament – very courageously opposing the massive corruption that grips Kenya.

I was kidnapped on the first day Kenya.

I went into Casino and filmed Molo’s slum.

I saw kids whose hair was reddish brown for lack of nutrition.

I saw many kids walking around the debris and rubbish with no shoes.

I saw men drinking a locally brewed illicit drink meant to intoxicate in a matter of minutes.

I saw the shallow roadside ditches where these same men sometimes pass out in only to drown in a few inches of rainwater.

I met a couple (the directors of Chazon) who have sold their own profitable businesses, sold much of their own property and sacrificed themselves to try to get kids off the street.

I preached at a local black Pentecostal church.

I was approached by a prostitute offering sex for the remainder of a half eaten bag of popcorn – she was 9 -10 years old

I met other IVs from the UK, Spain, Canada and the US.

We hauled hundreds of gallons of water up two flights of stairs every two to three days.

We lost electricity regularly.

I ate like African royalty, we had meat often (mostly lamb) and I was introduced to African tea. It’s amazing stuff and an important cultural activity.

I introduced my African hosts to American Tea and made sure we always had some on hand – they loved it! Coca-Cola

Almost over the jet lag

2009-08-22T13:50:00.000-07:00

It's been pretty bad with the jet lag but I'm nearly back to normal. Today I spent the whole day working on logos for the Chazon group and also organizing the shots from the film - it's quite time consuming. Tomorrow will be much the same routine. The space that the film takes up (measured in GB's is quite taxing. I will need to invest in some more storage quite soon. The footage shot at Melon is less then adequate, this is quite disappointing. I was hoping that maybe if that footage was good I might be able to get the film done all the quicker (i.e. avoid the trips to Peru and Jamaica). The need for the potential funding in Molo, Kakaru is so great that I didn't want to add additional delay. Not going to Watoto Wa Baraka is weighing heavy.

I just watched the footage of the cement work being done in one of the classrooms I paid for a good deal of this - it was great to see the contribution being put into such good use. I wasn't able to get back up to the classroom to see the final results but I'm sure it was great. Alicia was helping with the application of cement to the walls. The men working there were quite impressed. I've been told that white men don't usually get involved with manual labor, so a white woman doing such heavy work was quite out of the norm.

My weight was down quite a bit in Africa - lost 20 plus pounds but I have gained back nearly 15, tomorrow I'l start back into the low calorie routine again :)

back to the modern world

2009-08-13T23:39:00.000-07:00

I got home late on Wednesday - everything made it back safely (including me) and I got through all the security check points, but with a good deal of scrutiny. It's almost 2:00 am and I will be getting up at 4:45 am to go and do my first run in about 30 days. I got to get back into the routine again.

I'm not sure where I stand now with the down200 film. I feel if I don't (or can't) get the surgery to remove the skin I can't complete the film. I will press again in that regard with docs here at Mayo. Honestly though, I'm already starting to think I want to get the International Volunteer film done first, it's just far more important. I'll be back to work tomorrow also... this will of course consume the majority of my time. When you add the exercise time to the mix there isn't much time left over. I'm so rusty with Final Cut I think I will attempt to get a friend from the DVXuser group to give me a refresher course one of these weekends. I trained and used it many years ago and the program is quite a bit different.

I never made it to Watoto Wa Baraka - but I did play a role in resolving the conflict. Geoffrey (Director of Watoto) did the right thing and the volunteers there should be proud for the stance they took. More details on this and what happened as I learn more (if it becomes appropriate to share). For my part it only required one e-mail from someone who was looking very objectively at a tragedy that was about to unfold. I hope that over time the volunteers there will not feel too bitter about the experience. It wasn't what any of them signed up for and I'm sure it made things quite difficult but in the long run they have made a very valuable contribution. Not just at WWB but likely all over Kenya, as Geoffrey has been a mentor and role model for many of these operations in the area and his change of heart seems quite sincere.

It's 2:30 am and I think I'm really jet lagged - oh well,,, the real life will kick back in a couple of hours... Molo is now a big part of my real life. So is Ruth. August 7th was pretty amazing actually - I ended up adopting a little girl. I wasn’t planning to - it just worked out that way. At Chazon the call it adoption but really it is a sponsorship opportunity. Her name is Ruth and she doesn’t live far from the Chazon School. Her gardian approched me on the road as I was walking back from the Chazon on Wedseday (August 5th). She shared a very sad story about all the orphans in her care. I suggested that she approach Lucy at the Chazon and I gave her 1,000 Khs. She showed up two days later and they were going to turn her away. She had three kids with her for testing. Ruth was the youngest. All tested fairly poorly but since I was willing to sponsor they are going to give her a chance. It’s imposible to describe how this made the family feel.

Ruth lost both her father and mother to HIV/AIDS. Her Aunt is the primary care giver and the grandmother was the one who approached me. They have three of there own two from other families and 2 others who are Ruth’s brothers. It’s a joy to see the entire family there three women and two older gentlemen and you would have thought they just won the lotterry. Keep in mind what the whole family was celebrating and what they will surley gave thanks to God for is that one of there children has now been accepted into elementary school.

This is something that we in the US take for granted. It’s just a given that your child can go to school in the US. Just like electricity and running water I guess. We just take so much for granted. The grandmother was on the road waiting for me - looking for help. It’s a great felling to be involved on this level. I highly reccomend it! Ruth looks really bad (though she is quite beautiful). She appears malnurished and Lucy suspects HIV/AIDS. She also has a stick stuck in her ear (FOR MORE THEN A YEAR NOW). The family could not afford to take her to the doctor for that. Her skin looks so whether worn - there’s something wrong. She’s going to the doctors tomorrow. I will pay for this (on going) and also for her schooling/school uniform and some miscallenous. It’s a good feeling and given that losing weight wasn't enough - that what could I do to really "live big" was an issue for me - I must say this qualifies.

A blog from me? Hard to believe.

2009-08-01T19:38:00.000-07:00

It’s almost 3:00 am and I have given up on sleeping. I’m sicker then a dog. And at night, in Molo, they never stop barking. Last Saturday night it turned quite cold and breathing in the air got me quite sick. Tonight I can only hope it has reached it’s peak. I have had such a bad cough that I can’t sleep and it’s beyond a cough at this point - it seems as though my throat is constricting. I have no meds and there are none available. Elizabeth brewed an African cold remedy for me - and I am heartily drinking it down but so far it’s not helping much. I get some relief by standing up - so here I am blogging - kind of - I’m at my own laptop and I hope I can transfer this in the morning. Oh - I guess it’s already morning.

We are all working so hard. I’m working from the moment I wake up between 4-6 am until I get the last of the days shooting down loaded to a portable hard drive and all the needed electronics and batteries recharged typically past 11:00 PM. So far despite numerous power outages and limited access to outlets I have managed to keep all the tech stuff alive (charged) and working.

Yesterday I told Lucy (she’s pure salt of the earth) that she would not be able to execute the vision that’s forming - and manage the coming change using the deadly slow internet connection at the cyber cafe. So I have purchased her a Safaricom modem and put 500 shillings of air time on it. I have commited to ongoing support of this too. Tomorrow I will teach her about social networking and she’s already loving having e-mail anywhere she goes and just can’t stop thanking me enough. It is by far the best 4,499 Kenya shillings I have ever spent. It will also enable me to post this blog. And maybe a few photos too. It even works at the school, the school is in the country side where the tribal clashes were at there worst earlier this year.

So much to talk about. Can’t cover it all - I have been journaling daily about the experience and that’s been fairly thorough. First the kids are great - so incredibly well behaved and so eager to learn. I don’t get to spend much time with them though it’s one of the more difficult things to deal with. Two days ago the saddest hardest part of the trip hit me. I passed through one of the classrooms to set up for Jordi’s interview and one of the little girls said “teacher why don’t you spend more time with us?” - I almost cried. I did my best to explain that my role here was a little different and that I hoped to spend more time with them soon. Then they asked would I be back after the break (they take off 4 weeks every trimester). I could not say no - for two reasons - I didn’t want to break their hearts and also even though they were closing down the school yesterday I thought I heard that the kids and a few teachers would be brought back next week... I now know this is true.

My time has been spent filming the other volunteers spending time with the kids, a lot of time with the two directors, learning about Molo, Chazon, doing interviews, and constantly shooting and hauling my equipment (very heavy) - without the weight loss and all the conditioning this would have been completely impossible to do. I have walked back and forth to the school carrying the equipment a few times - that’s not easy, I tried using the Matatu’s but they are so crowded getting on and off is difficult and mostly now I get rides on the back of motor cycles. It’s just seems to be the easiest way to get out to the school. These guys are a little crazy and they supposedly get in a lot of accidents and the roads are in such horrible condition, but for now I have no other choice. I have convinced all the other volunteers to give them a try - the Katies (UK) also loved it - and the two of them ride together - three on a bike.

I’m beginning to allow myself to think that this might just work - the site for attracting international visitors will be quite good it’s not that hard to do and I have good folks back in the US who have already committed to help. The real prize would be for the film to bring in significant funding. The reason why I’m allowing myself to entertain this thought - is because the footage I’m shooting is really looking incredible. I have great sound. The story is GREAT - and the people involved are great. I’m thinking now that all that may be left is to edit it and add music. After our hard work today Lucy and I reflected upon this. She is also sensing that it is within grasp. This kind of money would not only provide all that they can imagine for the Chazon school but also it could change Molo.

I told her that this is really what I want more then anything to see Molo great again. What an honor it would be to play such a key role in the transformation of even one small part of the world. It now feels possible.

Molo is hard to fathom without being here. The poverty is so great. Unemployment is above 50%. Children live in the streets because both parents were killed in the clashes or due to HIV/AIDS. Sometimes they are forced into prostitution to survive and many have turned to glue. Once into the glue they become unreachable. The adults at risk tend to favor a local brew that not only gets you drunk for less then 10 shillings - as Samuel tells me, but it also puts them flat on there backs in a few minutes. During the rainy season many pass out in the ditches only to drowned when the rains come.

Last Sunday I interviewed the tribal chief of Molo and a local politician running for Parliament. Both were impressive men - both quite brave and both fighting the corruption that makes political solutions to the problems here quite difficult. Both were so taken by Samuel and Lucy and they both said that they represent real hope for Molo.

Today I acquired video footage of what people here call the “inferno” or the “tragedy”. It truly symbolizes the desperate level of poverty that exists in Molo and how tragic the results can be. Earlier this year a large tanker truck containing jet fuel went of the road and rolled. This was just outside Molo. Soon many people showed up attempting to recover free fuel to try to sell in town. The police stepped in and started charging people to take the fuel away. Someone who was angry about the charging let a match and the whole thing exploded burning to death more then 500. I’m going to buy rights to use the footage in my film - 500 shillings (about $18 US). More tomorrow.

I finally got to go into Casino. It’s the poorest region here in Molo. It’s very sad. Some of the children there had the brown/reddish hair that is the result of malnutrition. I’ve seen this many times in documentaries or in news stories - in places like Ethiopia or the Sudan, it’s pretty heart breaking to see it in person. There was a lot of trash piled up every where - it was hard to shoot emotionally but also physically. When you watch what you are shooting you can’t be watching where you are walking so well. Alicia Bruce arrived from Canada yesterday, she was expected to meet with Lucy for orientation but when she heard that Samuel and I were going to Casino she wanted to join us. It was probably even more risky then I thought. Jordi also came along and we gathered a large crowd (mostly small children following us) but the longer we stayed the more uneasy it became. Samuel was a very good guide and we had someone with us who lives in Casino and is from Elizabeth’s church Elizabeth is one of our hosts (she was also there). Some men became aggressive towards Alicia and Samuel pushed her to the left and blocked them. She moved towards me and I almost put my arm around her to send the message to these men that she was with me. It was a bad situation because we had only met an hour earlier. Samuel later said he feared we were about to be mobbed.

The children seemed very happy though. God bless them. We visited several homes and Jordi commented that he wanted to adopt one and take them out (very difficult to do in Kenya) Instead he will sponsor ones education and Samuel very discretely found and talked to three parents as we were going through and asked them to have the children at Chazon on Tuesday of next week. They will interview them and one will be picked. Jordi will pay for his or hers education going forward and one kids life will take a dramatic turn for the better.

I’m now devastated. Lucy called Geoffrey at Watoto Wa Baraka only to find out that he doesn’t want me to come now. They are having problems (a problem?) and don’t want me there at this time. It’s now or never I’m afraid and it really throws a twist into the film that I’m not sure I can recover from. Anyone following Jarka’s Live Big blog already knows the issue. I can’t began to tell you the roller coaster ride it has been trying to get to Watoto Wa Baraka. To the point where I don’t think I even have the strength to e-mail him to convince him otherwise. I think the problem he is having can be resolved and that he needs to comment on it - let others talk about it - don’t run from it - otherwise his side of the story may not get out. I’m not defending him either - I don’t know the details - I don’t know what exactly happened but it can’t be good to hide it - and you will not be able to. The volunteers are already blogging.

Here are a few pics - the horizontal one is a clip from a shoot in a classroom.

my last blog for awhile

2009-07-12T08:31:00.000-07:00

There is so much to do right now in preparing to leave for Africa that I'm fairly confident I will not get it all done but hopefully all the bigger more important things will be completed. I will pack today - for the most part at least I intend to have all my carry-on stuff packed. This is such a challenge because I need to get all the necessary equipment for shooting an entire full-length documentary into one small carry-on size back pack and a laptop bag. I will also wear a photographers vest on to the plane and it will be packed full as will most of my pockets! (thanks for the loan of the vest Brian - and all the other items!).

I'm also bringing to stowed bags as Dick Blick sent some art supplies for the Kids and I will need to bring that along. I will also try to get out and pick them up some stuff myself. Not sure what yet but something fun - it's a challenge because there are over 70 kids.

So this is the last of my blogs for awhile - a month or more (unless I can get internet there). Actually I'll be so thankful just to get electricity to keep the equipment charged and working. Soon I will start a blog about the new documentary film I'm starting and also much about my experience in Kenya.

I weighed 215.2 toady.

11 Days till I leave for Africa

2009-07-03T18:37:00.000-07:00

Today my backpack arrived, it appeared too big for carry-on and yet when I started packing it it seemed too small for my needs. It's not to big for carry on I checked the specs in advance. It may well be too small for my needs I will adjust my needs accordingly. I will also pack a laptop bag for carry-on and it will be holding more then just a laptop also my friend is sending a 12 pocket vest - I'll fill that too. I'll keep an eye on the total weight limits as well.

I also received my 3rd P2 Card today It's a 64 Gig card - I'll be able to shoot about 60 minutes of video at 24 fps wide screen Hi-Def. It's as good as it gets. I have two other P2 Cards each at 16 GIGs each. This gives me about an hour and half of shooting. I think I need one more 64 GIG card - they're expensive. If I get that then the cost of the media will have superseded the cost of the camera. Oh well...

My friend Jarka is already in Kenya. She arrived about a week ago - her luggage was lost in Cairo. Please pray that it will be found and returned soon. Not only is this a tremendous inconvenience but her anti Malaria meds were in the bag.

I weighed 218 today.

good run + i'm going to Africa

2009-07-01T17:57:00.000-07:00

Finally had all the little pains gone - it's been awhile for that. I really enjoyed the run for a change :)

In just 13 days I leave for Molo, Kenya. I'm volunteering at the Chazen Children's Centre orphanage. It's a fairly new organization in an area that has seen a fair share of tribal warfare recently. My role as volunteer is rather complex. I will be meeting with the directors (Lucy and Samuel) to gather information about their vision for CCC and to assist them in developing a brand/website/presence with the goal of attracting International Volunteers to help establish a sustainable and growing operation. This is in conjunction with a second documentary film I'm currently making about the concept of 'International Volunteering". It's a beautiful concept. The idea is for people who have a heart for volunteering to join these organizations for typically 2-3 months, while paying a small room and board fee - typically between $70-$90 a week. This money goes so far in Africa and can often be the main means of support for these organizations. The volunteers benefit by being completely immersed in the culture and in the lives of these children. The living is hard for most and the experience typically has a profound effect on the volunteers. Many have said Africa changes you.

I will also be afforded the opportunity to teach the kids art. I requested a donation of art supplies from Dick Blick, they will be shipping me a box of supplies this week. I really appreciate this generosity - I'm running up so much debt and was already planing to try to buy art supplies for 75+ kids in Nairobi. Hallmark/Crayola are currently also considering making a donation. I hope I can get some serious quantities of crayons :) according to a volunteer currently at Chasen, the crayons available in Kenya are not very good!

More to come on Africa - that's for sure!

I weighed 218.4 today.

Pain and weight gain

2009-06-23T21:17:00.001-07:00

While i was running today I thought about blogging about pain. I can honestly say that since I started running I have never been without one pain or another. The shins splints early on were practically unbearable and the muscle pull of a few weeks ago pretty much stopped that run. But outside of those two somewhat debilitating injuries it's been one nagging little soreness after another. It's daily pain, every single day and it reminds me of my more athletic high school and college days when i was really into the wrestling. A friend of mine and I trained together quite seriously year round. We were in constant pain then too - nothing ever too serious - but i think anyone training hard always has something hurting or sore.

So as I'm thinking this (while running on the treadmill this morning) three things happen. First, and as quick as i stated to run, my butt is hurting! This started in Florida for the first time and seems as though it will be an issue for awhile - then half way through my right knee buckles and hurts - and finally with 15 minutes left the muscle pull comes back slightly. With 15 minutes to go i decide i really need to finish - but at the same time twice now I've pushed past the minor muscle pull only to have it really go bad. With 8 minutes to go - it went really bad! - I had to quit. I think there is a perception that because someone works out a lot and may even appear to be quite fit that they are "feeling great" too. I really believe they are more then likely hurting one way or another.

The second part of this lengthy blog is that I gained 18 pounds! This was no surprise to me at all. The last time I ran while on my trip to Florida was Wednesday evening. On Thursday and Friday I drove for a total of about 22 hours. I slept over at my brothers on Friday and drove another 16 hours on Saturday. I was so exhausted that I slept a good deal Sunday and skipped running that day too. So I had 4 days of no running. When I weighed in on Monday (first day back to the running I weighed 232.4 pounds! This is why I will be running everyday of my life till I die! It's just what I have to do. I know that from time to time circumstances will interrupt my routine though. And I also realize that this sort of gain goes away as quickly as it came. Yesterday I weighed 232.4 and today I was down to 224.4 an eight pound drop in one day. So the gain will be short lived.

Oh - one more pain - my new shoes are creating blisters on my big toes - ugh!

Today I weighed 224.4 pounds.

Pain and weight gain

2009-06-23T21:17:00.000-07:00

While i was running today I thought about blogging about pain. I can honestly say that since I started running I have never been without one pain or another. The shin splints early on were practically unbearable and the muscle pull of a few weeks ago pretty much stopped that run. But outside of those two somewhat debilitating injuries it's been one nagging little soreness after another. It's daily pain, every single day and it reminds me of my more athletic high school and college days when i was really into the wrestling. A friend of mine and I trained together quite seriously year round. We were in constant pain then too - nothing ever too serious - but i think anyone training hard always has something hurting or sore.

So as I'm thinking this (while running on the treadmill this morning) three things happen. First, and as quick as i stated to run, my butt is hurting! This started in Florida for the first time and seems as though it will be an issue for awhile - then half way through my right knee buckles and hurts - and finally with 15 minutes left the muscle pull comes back slightly. With 15 minutes to go i decide i really need to finish - but at the same time twice now I've pushed past the minor muscle pull only to have it really go bad. With 8 minutes to go - it went really bad! - I had to quit. I think there is a perception that because someone works out a lot and may even appear to be quite fit that they are "feeling great" too. I really believe they are more then likely hurting one way or another.

The second part of this lengthy blog is that I gained 18 pounds! This was no surprise to me at all. The last time I ran while on my trip to Florida was Wednesday evening. On Thursday and Friday I drove for a total of about 22 hours. I slept over at my brothers on Friday and drove another 16 hours on Saturday. I was so exhausted that I slept a good deal Sunday and skipped running that day too. So I had 4 days of no running. When I weighed in on Monday (first day back to the running) I weighed 232.4 pounds! This is why I will be running everyday of my life till I die! It's just what I have to do. I know that from time to time circumstances will interrupt my routine though. And I also realize that this sort of gain goes away as quickly as it came. Yesterday I weighed 232.4 and today I was down to 224.4 an eight pound drop in one day. So the gain will be short lived.

Oh - one more pain - my new shoes are creating blisters on my big toes - ugh!

Today I weighed 224.4 pounds.

two runs down

2009-06-17T13:32:00.000-07:00

I did one of my two runs at 6:30AM 4 miles and the 2nd at 11:30AM - the first was cool and comfortable - the 2nd was like running in a sauna! but both felt great. i told my mom i was glad to have both done so early and she asked why don't i do a third later? i'm actually thinking about it!

I weighed 215.8 today.

blah blah blah

2009-06-16T13:59:00.000-07:00

Ran again - still HOT! Will run again here shortly. Enjoying the tie off.

I weighed 213.4 today

My first Florida run

2009-06-14T07:31:00.000-07:00

I ran this morning (as planed) - four miles. My knees were hurting just a bit - i did it in 45 minutes which is what it's been taking me to do 3 miles in Minnesota. There are no hills here at all and no wind - but it was chilly this morning. I'm at a Panera right now - free wi-fi :) - i'll do another 4 this afternoon when it's 90+ - that'll be great.

Also I will be working very hard this afternoon - on my tan. Since I will be going to Africa this summer it's best to get this going early - and with the weather in Minnesota it's likely i won't be getting tan there before I leave. Laying around sunning myself in this beautiful pool will not be easy but...I need to do it to keep my skin healthy while in Africa.

The flight was great and I my older brother joined us last night for crab legs!

I weighed 213 today.

off to florida

2009-06-12T10:17:00.000-07:00

tomorrow i leave for florida and won't be back for awhile. i'm flying one way and driving back - not sure whether i'll have internet connections or not - so i may actually have an excuse for not blogging. figured that i need to get at least a quick blog before i go. i'm planning to do two 4 miles runs a day while there - it's real hot though - we'll see.

i'm going to africa this summer to help a relatively new orphanage get it's international volunteer program off the ground. the whole international volunteer system is so amazing, i'll also be shooting for a documentary film about it and the people who volunteer.

I weighed 213.4 today.

another poem?

2009-05-28T16:05:00.000-07:00

Ok it's been a while since I shared any of my poems.

Yesterday I didn't take my own advice and slow down a bit and ended up pulling my leg muscle again - not to the same extent because I knew to stop right away. Good thing is though it happened at the very end of the run. Today I actually did slow it down quite bit and that helped. Just a little pain. Will run at home and box tonight.

I weighed 215.2 today.

Here's the poem:

fierce love

fierce love fierce love
scrub your hands sterile slip on a glove
rib spreaders pierce your side
and let out the love

fierce love fierce love
your pillows made of rock, dream of
something precious, so precious
tugs on pant legs and gentle shoves

offer up, offer up
flesh, who cares? shoot it up!
love’s a drug fierce love’s heroin
and the highest high is from on high

barbed wire barbed wire
tightly bind our hearts together
let our blood flow as one
true love, fierce love, red blood

bleed you, bleed me
embrace the insecurity
each recklessly overcompensating
we'll strive to be worthy one to the other

new pb

2009-05-26T15:57:00.000-07:00

I have been blogging less and less- it's just that lately the only thing I can really discuss is the exercise routine (that's got to be boring). I can at least say, quite happily, that I have fully recovered from the muscle pull. in fact I have had a personal best time now for several days in a row. Just before the injury I had moved into the 7.07-7.08. Then Friday I pushed a little harder and got a 7.11, Sunday 7.14 - day off on Memorial Day (Monday) and then this morning 7.37 miles in an hour. I'll likely drop the pace a little tomorrow as I don't want another injury - but I feel I'm solidly in the 7's going forward.

I've alluded to big plans for the summer - and blogged that they fell through - well they are on again! I'm so happy. Again I will likely go into more detail about this when I get back. Mean while I'm now inline for guitar lessons which is great - I'm going to start electric.

Also I met with my good friend Daniel again today - he's a homeless man (by choice) and is writing his first novel. I have immense respect for him actually and confidence he will succeed. He shared with me today that if his book is a success he plans to invest money in Micro loans to third world countries. Didn't surprise me to hear that at all - His spirit shines through! Also Daniel now has access to a plane and will teach me to fly this summer. It's an ultra light, lesson will begin as soon as the plane has been re skinned. Sometime this summer.

I weighed 215.9 today.

pulled a muscle

2009-05-17T09:41:00.000-07:00

It happened yesterday - Saturday. After running 7 + miles (in less then an hour) for two days in a row, I went ahead and tried for three in a row. Recently, as I have continued to increase my MPH's as soon as I reached a new plateau I would immediately back off and take a week or so to slowly work up again to the new level - not this time though (that was a big mistake). After just a couple of minutes of running my left leg started to hurt behind the knee - I noticed it and thought OK it's not too bad I can handle that. After about ten minutes I increased the speed and it hurt all the worse so I jumped off the treadmill (to the sides) and massaged the leg and that seemed to help. I then pushed the speed to 7.9 - (keep in mind that 8.1 has been my last 40 second sprint speed) with just a little more then 20 minutes into the run I felt a terribly sharp pain shoot through the same area. I jumped off again and tried to massage it again but it didn't work.

Thought maybe if I slowed the belt down I might be able to keep running (no that was crazy thinking) as soon as I started running again it was killing me again... so I had to quit - this is the shortest run yet - a little over 22 minutes. I could barely walk after. I thought for sure I'd not be able to run today - but I did. The leg was still hurting, but not nearly so bad and I only ran 5 miles in the hour - that was a really slow pace. But I got through it just fine. I am now and will continue to ice my leg - it's feeling a lot better already.

I weighed 214.8 today.

going in for a run soon

2009-05-16T06:32:00.000-07:00

I'm at home right now - using the dial-up connection to do my blog. I will go in for my run soon and then back home to cut the grass. Yesterday's run was another 7.08 miles. It was great to do it again and it really wasn't so hard. I've been in the 6.4-6.6 miles for so long and then I just pushed it - for no real reason.

It really struck me that we're all probably capable of far more then we realize all we need to do is push ourselves beyond what we are comfortable with. Not just exercise either.

I weighed 210.2 today.

up early this morning

2009-05-14T05:20:00.000-07:00

No excuse not to blog this morning as my daughter couldn't sleep and since my alarm was going to go off in an hour anyway I decided I might as well head in early so my alarm wouldn't wake her (if she should fall asleep). I had my best run yet - I actually broke the 7 mile mark (11.39 KM) in an hour. I ran 7.08 mies - it felt great. I have also been running at home in the evenings and that has been going pretty well. And I've been keeping up with the boxing routine.

I'm going to be moving my website onto my laptop for updates. I'm hoping this will result in an improved updating habit for my blog! I've been terrible as of late. Really there has not been too much to report - my big plans for the film and a second doc. fell through a couple days ago - and I'm hoping to change that. We'll see what happens in the next day or two.

I weighed 209.4 today.

shooting today

2009-05-02T11:26:00.000-07:00

I'm in the studio today - it'll be my first studio shooting for my film (I've done lots of this for Mayo) - it'll be fun - I need to establish the look and feel for all the interviews - I'm hoping to have a lot of white - I'l test the limits of this little camera for sure. I had a great run yesterday and a bad one this morning - did the whole crash and burn thing again. Just go completely weak. I thought I had this figured out - that it might relate to having too much sugar right before the run - but I had none this morning at all. It hit about 15 minutes into an hour run. I stopped and took about 5 minutes rest and came back walking for about ten minutes and then recovered to finish the run. That was a good thing.

I weighed 209.2 today.

finally!

2009-05-01T15:17:00.000-07:00

I have been quite remiss in getting myself shot running on the treadmill at the DAHLC. I was just hesitant to even ask and it took a little bit of an approval process - but today I finally got it done. It was a really good run and Jay Koski shot and a public retaliations official stood nearby (to help if folks had questions about what was going on) she was quite helpful.

I'm glad this is out of the way (at least for now) if I get the excess skin surgery I hope to shoot maybe one more time at the DAHLC. As of February 25th I have basically been in a maintenance mode. I was down to 207.4 then - today I weighed in at 208 even. I'm thinking of dropping into the 190's - I guess I'm getting a little bored with the maintenance phase.

I weighed 208 today.

into the new routine

2009-04-30T14:20:00.000-07:00

It's been a challange with the new boxing routine under way but it's starting to work out OK. The boxing part is great, I can already feel big improvements in my upper body, muscle and conditioning. The tougher part of this is the 3 mile run. I have traded the evening's 6.3 mile treadmill run for a real 3 mile on the gravel road run by my home. At the end of the 2nd attempt I had fairly severe pain in both knees (didn't last long). That carried over to the mornings treadmill and by the 4th run I could hardly walk for the pain in my left ankle. I took off two days of the real run (3 mile evening) and that seems to have resolved all "pain" issues...

So I'm now running 9.3 miles a day + the boxing routine.

One of my good friends (and relatives) suggested I might need new shoes. I think she's right. The New Balance pair I have now is less then a year old but already have thousands of miles on them and they are ripping open in the toes and sides. This is pretty normal for me (wide feet) but now that I'm back on the gravel roads I'm being forced to stop several times to pull stones out of my shoes as I'm running (that's not good!) - so a new pair of running shoes seems necessary now!

I weighed 208.8 today.

sore today

2009-04-20T15:32:00.001-07:00

i started the boxing routine a little last night and I'm feeling sore! i ran outside again too - hope that becomes the routine going forward. the first three miles (saturday) took 39 minutes - last night was 33 minutes.

anyway i've come to realize that there is a way to "live big" i'm now considering, actually i've decided already. i'm going to make a live liver donation. i'm doing some research on it now - and it seems doable - not as crazy as it sounds.

i weighed 209.2 today.

boxing starts

2009-04-18T17:22:00.000-07:00

yesterday I finally started with the training for the boxing routine. at least i did the running. that may sound a little odd given how much i have already been running on the treadmill, but i have been pretty apprehensive about returning to what i call "real running". it went really well, last time i ran on the hills near my home I was a good 125 lb. heavier. everything from the uphill climbs to the pounding was no problem. i did 3 miles in 39 minutes. that's much slower then the pace on the treadmill - but i have a feeling i will really see that time drop quickly as this becomes more of my routine.

i weighed 209.4 today

Live Big

2009-04-17T05:59:00.000-07:00

as my body fell to the ground
illusions of limitations fell as well
so in an effort to see more clearly
i removed the logs from my eyes
and wrote a list of some things I now realize,
that we all need to realize

1. the worlds a mess and you know it
2. you can and should do something to make it better
3. what you do will make a difference
4. what's stopping you? do something

live big

i weighed 208.4 today.

Gone for awhile there

2009-04-12T12:45:00.000-07:00

I'm back - it's been quite a busy week - I just haven't had time to blog or do little else. I'm putting some real hours into an upcoming art show (new art) and also something big for the summer. Both have taken a high priority for me these last couple weeks. I continue with the running and my weight has pretty much stayed steady. I've been in the maintenance phase now for better then a month. I did finally get a letter off to my doc again in an effort to get a couple of surgeries done prior to the "big event" of the summer!

I weighed 207.3 today.

got the editing process started

2009-03-31T17:40:00.000-07:00

Finally got a good deal of my clips processed and organized (to some degree). Also, had two of the best runs yet (both today). Pressing hard with that - not much time tonight - got to get home and get some art done for the upcoming show.

I weighed 210 today.

one more thing

2009-03-30T16:53:00.001-07:00

OK - how could i (in the previous blog) have left out the very important concept of blogging about your weight loss effort. I highly recommend that you if you need to lose weight and you're planning to start a diet and exercise program - blog about it daily. It brings a higher level of accountability and you may just meet some really great people who will give you advice or inspire or encourage you along the way!

I weighed 212.2 pounds today.

back to running / + 3 things

2009-03-27T19:24:00.000-07:00

had a great run - very little pain - best run yet. i normally hold the sides of the treadmill - maybe for as much as 15-20 minutes of the run. i use to kinda beat myself up for this, but figured what i was doing was working... tonight i ran the entire run and maybe held the sides for less then a minute. that was actually quite a surprise. i ran hard too - i was listening to Blue October a band i heard play live at a late night party for a movie called "my Suicide". they were handing out discs at the party (i took two).

i had an interview with the Pioneer Press Thursday. i shared three things that i have learned - but not sure that i have blogged about yet. on a PBS program i heard a doc say that to lose weight and keep it off requires a "super human effort" i agree with that and have been inspired by the comment through out my effort. they mentioned that 97% of all diet attempts fail. my own experience confirms this. so here's my take on that - three things to keep in mind if you want to beat the odds.

1. Sticking to a diet requires a super human effort and executing an effective exercise program also requires a super human effort. Don't start out by trying to do both at once. I really believe this is why the percentage of failed attempts is SO HIGH. I highly recommend that you start your exercise effort first - no diet. Eat what you normally do. Focus on the exercise first. I started by running for 2 miles 3-4 days a week. I did this for six months before I started dieting. I lost less then 5 pounds during that 6 months. But I improved my conditioning and I was totally and comfortably into a routine - one super human effort was behind me - one super human effort at a time is enough. Once I got going on the diet the weight dropped like magic. And once i reached my first plateau I was prepared to increase my exercise effort to counter this.

2. Everyone is good at something. Everyone is successful in something. Take the principles and practices that you never fail in and apply them to you diet and exercise effort. For me making my weight loss effort into a creative project made all the difference this time. The focus is on deadlines and meeting expectations that have little to do with the weight loss itself force and drive a successful project over-all (it just happens to include getting into shape again and losing weight).

3. Be incredibly selfish. It sounds terrible - but almost everything in my life that hasn't contributed to the process or success has been set-aside. It's not mean spirited - I have just found that helping out by making meals makes me fail. The current exercise routine requires 4 hours a day. There's a good 9-10 hours on the full-time JOB, and with the blogging and website and filmmaking - the entire day is spent. If you want to lose weight it has to become your #1 priority.

I weighed 210.4 today.

sxsw withdrawal

2009-03-23T10:49:00.000-07:00

i crashed and burned during my run Sunday - only got in about 1.5 miles. i think it might be withdrawal from the food there in Texas both the great quality and quantity. also i have had some pain in my upper inner thighs ever since i increased my workout to 13 + miles. i'm skipping my running for the next three days - hope this helps with the leg pain. also will be going back to 600 calories and a liquid only diet to counter the lack of exercise. my weight was up considerably this morning but that's because i didn't run today.

here's the band from the documentary "the Promised Land" i'm hopping to maybe use some of there music in my film.

http://www.myspace.com/lilbandogold

i weighed 223.6 today.

great workouts

2009-03-21T19:19:00.001-07:00

got in two great workouts today - though each was cut a little short - focused on upper body during the run - felt great.

getting my taxes done - got a nice return coming might even be able to purchase some of the missing parts and pieces I need!

i weighed 218.8 today.

I'm back

2009-03-20T16:42:00.000-07:00

Much to talk about regarding SXSW. First I'm pleased to say that I didn't gain a lot of weight. When I left on the March 13th I weighed 217.4. I was a little fearful I might gain as much as 25 lbs. Instead I gained a little over a pound. I'm very happy with that. I weighed 218.8 today. I'm still up from where I had been but I got through the challenge of last week pretty well. I was quite lucky because not only did the hotel have a first class workout facility but they also had Precore 966i treadmills all set for a manual 1 hour long. This is always my preference when at Mayo.

I got in 13 miles on the treadmills there at SXSW all but three of the 7 days. On two of those days I did 6.5 miles and on the other I did 9.5 miles. We all did a great deal of walking from venue to venue also. This certainly helped.

I've come back fairly inspired and anxious to get to the editing process of my film. There were many good films and documentaries I'm sure I'll be commenting on them all in the weeks to come. At this point it's just good to be back and I look forward to dropping my weight back into the single digits - perhaps by the end of next week.

I weighed 218.8 today.

For fun here's a pic of me and George Hardy, star of the 1988 nmovie Troll 2. The worst film ever made (according to one documentary we saw).

SXSW 2 days away

2009-03-11T05:47:00.000-07:00

I'll be leaving for SXSW in a couple days - I'm going to need to finally buy some new clothes. For work I have one pair of dress pants (they're actually far to big) and I have just one pair of blue jeans that fit. Since I'm running so much I just wash and re-wear the same clothes everyday. This isn't going to work at SXSW. I'll be gone for 6 days straight with no washing facilities. That would mean that I need to buy and bring 13 shirts, 13 pairs of socks, 13 pairs of underwear,13 pairs of shorts, 6 pairs of blue jeans (this is crazy) today I will check into Mayo's policy on using the hotels laundry service for sure!

I weighed 214.6 today.

another art show coming

2009-03-07T17:45:00.000-08:00

I'm going to be a part of another Art Show in Stewartville, MN in April. More details on that soon. I just wish I had more time would be nice to have a few more pieces painted.

I weighed 210.2 today.

SXSW is coming soon

2009-03-05T17:37:00.000-08:00

I've had some up and down days here - with the eating and the weight. I'm back down to 211.2 tonight. I'm getting ready to head back to SXSW - really looking forward to it at this point. Also just a bit apprehensive. I'll be gone for almost a full week and I will be eating out for every meal. I could easily gain 25 lbs. I don't want to. I originally told myself when I started on this diet that if I was successful I'd allow myself to eat all I wanted when I made my way back to Texas. Now that I've done it - I just can't allow myself to gain a lot of weight. It won't be easy though. I'm hoping there will be a treadmill there and I will simply have to find a way to it every day if not twice a day. I think I read somewhere on the Mayo Clinic travel policy that Mayo now covers laundry service for those who are maintaining an exercise routine while at the conference events. I'll need to double check on that.

I bloged about a movie, a documentary, called Man on Wire. Congratulations!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9Pb_tLvs5o

I weighed 211.2 today.

brief again

2009-03-02T18:40:00.000-08:00

just a note to say:

I weighed 211.2 today.

good day ahead

2009-03-01T08:50:00.000-08:00

got my run in - just doing one - need to blog fast.

I'm attaching a pic of me in my blue jeans coat circa 1977-78. It's one of the few articles of clothing from my youth. Since I was in HS in the 70's this is a good thing. The clothes were a little ODD as I look back on some old photos of myself in that era.

it has been a long time goal to get back into this jacket!

get to paint today! can't wait

weighed 210.8 0n the 28th

weighed 210 today

Brief update!

2009-02-27T17:34:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I stayed very late working on some personal stuff and was just to tired to blog! So last night I weighed 207.8. Tonight I couldn't quite finish 6 miles during the 2nd run did maybe just 11 total for the day - oh well. I really need to figure out the right amount of calories to give me the energy for two runs and also not gain weight. I'm really in the maintenance phase at this point.

I weighed 208.4 today.

I've reached the goal

2009-02-25T18:57:00.000-08:00

Kind of - tonight I dropped a good amount again. I've really done well the last few days with restricting the calories and the running. I weighed 207.4 - which - if you minus the 40 lbs of excess skin = 167.4. Going into this of course I had no idea about the excess skin (at least not how much weight would be involved).

The surgery will be the only way the last 40 will be coming off. I'm going to stick with the same program - I may drop more weight yet - but for now I've made the goal (for what I control) just hope to hear from the doc soon re: surgery.

I weighed 207.4 today!!!

great day!

2009-02-24T19:00:00.000-08:00

just one of those great days where I'm really inspired and it all comes together. Not much time to blog - weight took a nice drop again.

I weighed 212.8 today.

tough day - tough run

2009-02-23T17:55:00.001-08:00

Didn't get enough sleep last night - had to take a friend to the emergency room. My morning run was great, but just felt so weak after getting about 3.5 miles into the second run. Only a ten mile day - better luck tomorrow. Feeling a little weak over all right now - hope I didn't pick up what my friend had

I weighed 218.4 today.

emergency room - again

2009-02-22T20:39:00.000-08:00

I'm back at the emergency room again - not for myself this time I needed to be here to drop off a friend. I'm waiting to take him home also. I was just getting ready to go do my second run when he called. I skipped the second run yesterday and I gained 5 lbs. since yesterday. I figured the second run would help me to get a little more of that off - not going to happen now! Oh well...

I did get in a good first run and tomorrow I'll be back on track.

I weighed 217.4 today.

Boring day

2009-02-21T18:08:00.000-08:00

Did just one run today - not feeling entirely well. The run seemed to make it worse. Busy all day with variety of mundane tasks. Sorry for the incredibly lacking effort on this blog tomorrow will be better I hope!

I weighed 212.4

Thanks Rochester Post Bulletin!

2009-02-20T18:45:00.000-08:00

Special thanks to the PB and Laura Gossman for the excellent article about me and the project. I really appreciate it. Here’s a link to the online version.

http://www.postbulletin.com/newsmanager/templates/localnews_story.asp?z=2&a=386179

I feel obligated to point out that there are three stories on the cover of the paper. The story about my weight loss and two separate stories about President Obama (I’m referring to the printed version of the paper). If you add up the space occupied by both of the President’s stories – I still got more press. I think this is the first time I've had a story on the cover of a newspaper in which the two opposing stories were about a sitting President and my story was occupying more real-estate.

I had the pleasure of seeing a Masque Theater Performance of Alice in Wonderland last night – this is why I failed (again) to blog last night. Since the article just ran in the paper and since I may see a spike in traffic to my site and the blog, I’ll use this opportunity to shamelessly support the play. PLEASE go see the play! It’s really great and the costumes alone make it worth the price of admission (which isn’t cheap - $15 for adults and $10 for children). The costumes were all hand made by members of the Masque Theater group.

Call for show times
14 - 4th Street SW
Rochester, MN 55902
(507)287-0704

I weighed 212.2 yesterday.
I weighed 211.4 toay.

Here are some pictures I shot last night. This is just a few of the wonderful costumes.

my daughter Paige played the Chesire Cat, the cook and Alice's sister.

I'm terrible

2009-02-19T05:59:00.000-08:00

I really need to get focused on this blog again. Intended to stay late last night to do many things but it was so cold again last night just couldn't do it. It snowed again too. I think that's enough for the year. But I know it's pretty common to have snow will into April here. This blog is really for yesterday. I hope to blog again tonight.

I weighed 211.8.

two posts in one

2009-02-17T18:43:00.000-08:00

Missed blogging again last night - oh well. I weighed 216.8 yesterday and tonight I weighed 212.8. I'm just 4 pounds away from my goal. I haven't heard from my doctor yet about a mtg. with the surgeon. I will need to get in touch with him again.

I'm feeling great. I weighed a little less then this a week or so ago but was feeling terribly depleted. I feel very strong right now. I think I will slip into the goal weight real soon here (next few days maybe). Hard to believe actually.

I weighed 212.8 today.

my conversation with Jarka

2009-02-15T18:45:00.000-08:00

I have been very busy of late - so many things going on. I didn't have a chance to blog last night and I have missed several days this month. There are some things that are far more important than blogging.

I have immense respect for Jarka, for her art (both the paintings/drawings and the poetry) and for the person she is. Today we had a private conversation touching on the transforming power of art - how it can change an individual (me actually). But art can potentially have such a positive effect on groups of peoples or opinions. Art for me could be a painting, a movie, a song, a poem, a performance.

It can also change the person - the artist - doing the art. This has happened for me with this project for sure. My weight loss wouldn't have happened but for the desire to create the film. I'm putting so much time and effort at this point into my filmmaking - which today included the mundane task of clearing files from an old hard drive to be able to transport digital clips to and fro for my film. In the process of doing this I came across this very old Cingular Wireless commercial that I found quite inspiring/transforming for me personally many years ago. Seeing it again today made me realize how "unbelievably lucky" I am.

I'm unbelievably lucky to have a friend like Jarka, I'm unbelievably lucky to leave this blog to go and run a second 6.5 miles for the day, I'm unbelievably lucky to be an artist and to have the freedom to pursue my passion and most of all I'm unbelievably lucky to know God.

I hoped to upload the movie clip but it wouldn't allow that but I did find it posted on youtube. I'm sure you have all seen this before but it surely warrants repeat viewings.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9KRGUjNFD-Q

I weighed 216.4 today.

weight just isn't dropping

2009-02-13T18:16:00.000-08:00

I have surprised myself by maintaining these 12 mile a day runs. I actually ran 13 miles today and 12.5 for the last couple days. Yet the weight has been fairly consistent. I weighed 217.8 today. Still have not heard from my doctor about meeting with the surgeon. I sure hope these blogs began to be more about the film and less about the exercise :)

I weighed 217.8 today.